Friday, 10 October 2008

Waiting Games

...

Is it just me or does it feel like the whole world is waiting? Waiting for elections, waiting for news on the global financial crisis... waiting.

My dad got tired of waiting and asked right out yesterday. He's been told what he was waiting to find out - he'll be one of those laid off next month. So he starts looking for a new job from today. Hubby is still waiting to hear if he'll have a job by the end of the year. He was told they'd bring him in for a meeting on "Thursday", but three Thursdays have come and gone since then.

Last month I was waiting to hear back about a small job I tried out for. Like my dad I got sick of waiting and demanded an answer. Like my dad the answer was a negative. I never got the job.

On the family front my cousin who left for Australia had to return back to South Africa as his ex doesn't want to let go. So now he is waiting too ... waiting to live.

That's how I feel lately, like I'm always waiting to live instead of living and athough those well-meaing email things talk of siezing the moment and enjoying today it can be hard to hold onto that when your life is floating in maybe land. Maybe you'll get the job... maybe you'll keep the job... maybe you'll find a home... maybe your landlord will want you to move on again...

I'm tired of waiting, but every time I try to force life to open a door I end up flat on my face. I know my Mayan destiny is to surrender, but I'm finding it hard to let go of taking action and learning to enjoy waiting.

Patience is NOT my virtue and to be fair... we've been waiting for a long time. Counting some long-term family dreams you could say we've all been waiting since about 1980. That is a long wait!

...and last week a card fell out a book I got as a gift last year. I have no idea where it came from or who put it in there. It didn't come from the gift-giver as the book was sent straight from Amazon. The card says...



*~SOON~*



I don't know whether to laugh, cry or... keep waiting!

...

10 comments:

  1. The best way to wait is to wait upon the Lord. You have friends across the Atlantic waiting with you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. It does seem that at this time, in particular, there is a lot up in the air all over the world. Sounds like it is even more so for you personally. My only advice would be to try to stop thinking about what is to come and live more in the moment. Maybe refocus your attention in another area or direction. I do know, though, that this is much easier for me to say than it is for you to be able to do because I've played that waiting game before too. I hope things get to a point soon for you and yours where you can enjoy the place and time you are in instead of always wishing to be in another.

    ReplyDelete
  3. That's a weighty tome you carry. I've always been alive in my head, and that's been enough for me, but you seemed tied into the mortal realm, and unfortunately I don't think I've been a part of that. Sure, we're all waiting for something, but if waiting is all we can do, why should we partake in undue alarm?

    ReplyDelete
  4. My heart goes to you.
    I'm waiting too... waiting for business to pick up, for clients to pay, but my bills aren't waiting.

    ReplyDelete
  5. We've been in a pattern of waiting for a long time as well. It was easier to wait when I could work, at least I had something to DO. But now I have nothing to do but wait. And the waiting is so long and drawn out, it's so stressful, and ever more complicated. It's exhausting. I feel your frustration and pain.

    I'm so sorry about your Dad's job and what sounds like your husband's job as well, the way things are going. I'm sorry the small job didn't pan out for you. I'm sorry your cousin is trapped by a selfish git who seems to want to punish her for everything he perceives she ever did wrong.

    The scariest thing for me is that this is life. Some of us are fortunate enough to not have to wait for much more than dinner. But I don't think that's the norm. I think most people are waiting, doing what they can about it, but waiting.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thank Genie and thanks for sharing your own waiting story.

    The worst part of waiting is that it usually relates to things you are helpless to change yourself. It's the helplessness that makes waiting stressful.

    (((Hugs)))

    ReplyDelete
  7. Sorry to hear about the wait. I really dislike waiting too. I'm too impatient for my own good. I can emphatise with you.

    ReplyDelete
  8. There's a movie called Flight of the Phoenix, it was a remake. I'm reminded of one of the character's lines from the movie, "I think a man only needs one thing in life. He just needs someone to love. If you can't give him that, then give him something to hope for. And if you can't give him that, just give him something to do."

    I think that's the problem with waiting and being helpless, there isn't even anything a body can DO about it. I think that's what makes it so hard.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Always keep waiting, for to not do so would be to give up. Of course, while you are waiting, find things you like to do that are within your means and enjoy doing them. You'll find you'll live along the way - and be happy about it. I've slowly learned to enjoy and treasure the small things. Flowers, sunsets, white topped waves on a wind tossed lake, a smile on a strangers face.

    ReplyDelete